Mr. Peepers Gossip

Isn’t that what’s really importent anyway?

The Golden Girl

The Silver Fox.

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Did Zoe Saldana do something to make her stylist mad at her?

This Givenchy dress looks great until you get below the waist, then it starts to resemble something that you’d find in RuPaul’s closet.

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Mo’Nique is going for that “nature girl” look on the red carpet again.   Guess she’s too busy to shave, or maybe her hubby likes her hirsute (shudder). 

Ironically, half the guys in attendence at last night’s awards ceremony probably have less hair on their legs than she does.

Excuse me, I have to go now and scrub my eyeballs with a Brillo pad and bleach.

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When was the last time she actually acted in something?  I can’t remember.

It’s getting to the point that Lindsay Lohan will show up to the opening of an envelope, never mind a Golden Globes after party.  She wasn’t at the awards ceremony itself, as there’s no category for cracked out tweets, melodrama, and career suicide.  Too bad, she’d be a shoe in.

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Some looked great, others….not so much. 

Here then,  a short list of hits and Mrs from last night’s red carpet

Loves me some Tina Fey, just not in that dress with those shoes.  Miss.

Catherine Henricks and the girls looked stunning, as usual.  Hit!

Where the hell did Quentin Tarantino get that outfit from, Vulcan?  What’s with the look on Reese’s face?  Is she mad because the rain did a number on her hair or she has to “share” a photo op?  Not sure I’m loving her dress here, the one she presented in was much prettier (this is what happens when your main gay and you part ways).  Miss x2

Lea Michelle from Glee.  (Looks like she’s lots of fun to be around too).  Miss.

Jane Lynch steps it up a notch from the track suit.  Hit!

Oh, Sookeh, what are you wearing?  Miss.

Bluntkinski.  Hit!

Chace Crawford’s hair and stubble.  Guy needs to embrace the pretty boy (both literally and figuratively) and stop trying so hard.  Miss.

Mad Men’s January Jones looked like a flapper going to a funeral.  Miss.

Because I promised myself I’d end this post on a positive note, Sandra Bullock pulling it off in purple.  Hit!

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…. unless you happen to be NBC, Jay Leno, The Hollywood Foreign Press Association and it’s president, anybody who’s had any plastic surgery (so in other words almost the entire audience), Gerard Butler or Mel Gibson.

Guess they thought it was a good idea at the time, but Gervais brought the snark with him in spades for his hosting duties.  Whether it was taking easy shots, “Guess I better get on with this before NBC replaces me with Jay Leno” to oh-no-he-didn’t moments such as when introducing the president of the HFPA, “…One thing that can’t be bought is a Golden Globe.  Offically” (pause as the audience’s collective intake of breath drops the air pressure in the room) “What!?  It’s not like I’m ever going to do this again anyway”, as well as introducing presenters in between taking swigs of something while on stage (I wonder if the FCC will fine NBC for that) “Here’s Jennifer Aniston and that bloke from 300″ and “I enjoy a drink as much as the next man, unless that man is Mel Gibson”, Ricky Gervais will go down as a memorable, if not completely charming host.

While some are complaining that he misread the audience, and left them cold, I thought he was a riot.  However, as his presence seemed to be cut somewhat as they evening progressed, something tells me Gervais won’t be hosting any more award ceremonies anytime soon.  Pity.

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If anything deserves to go down in flames, it’s this wretched reality TV dreck.  

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, people looking for a real partner don’t go on reality shows seeking love, just attention and a possible jump-start to a career in famewhoring.  Shocking, I know! 

Apparently, there’s already been one upset on the show as a famewhore hopeful was sent home along with one of the crew for having had a “relationship” with the man. 

 This probably happens more often than the producers let on, but since word had already got out (those vying for the bachelor’s “affections” are a vicious bunch) ABC decided to milk it for all it’s worth.  Most! Shocking! Bachelor! Premiere! Ever! 

Then there are the non-witty bon-mots and play on words because bachelor Jake Pavelka’s a commercial pilot, besides the eye-rolling, stomach turning addition to the title The Bachelor : The wings of love (gag).  My responses to them, underneath.

“You should fasten your seatbelt, cause it’s gonna be a bumpy ride“. 

Peepers – There was only one Bette Davis, and your not.  Eject!

“Hopefully in the end I become your co-pilot.  I would love to be the, um..the passenger.  In your plane”. 

Peepers – Room on this flight is on “stand by” only.

“I hate to interrupt you, but your flight attendant is here”  

Peepers – Get out of my cockpit!

“You can land your plane on my landing strip anytime” 

Peepers – It’s called a Brazilian sweetie.  Learn it.  Live it.  Love it.

See what I mean?  Those are enough to send someone into a tail-spin (it’s easy) or pray for total engine failure (meh), or crash-land on a derserted island with no TV (ok, I think I’ll stop now).

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According to me, that is.

I’m not a movie critic, nor do I purport to be one.  I just like what I like.  I tend to go for “movies” over “films” and it tickles me to no end when I see critics fall over each other trying to sing the praises of something most people won’t see (let alone get) to appear either cultured, or at least un-neanderthal like in the eyes of their peers.  Don’t get me started on the ones who get a bug up their ass when they get assigned something they deem beneath them and pretty much write the negative review prior to seeing the movie in question.  Trust me.  It happens more than you think. 

Anyway, enough with the negativity.  On with the list.

10 – X-Men (2000)

Director Bryan Singer actually pulled it off.  An introduction to a group of superheros who by chance, intent, or even against their better judgement, work together to save one of their own and a city full of people from a misguided villan (the best kind).  Sure, the film’s not perfect, Halle Berry’s African accent and bad wig in her role as Storm come to mind, but at just over 90 minutes, everyone I was with at the theatre left wanting more.

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9 – Kill Bill Vol 1 (2003)

A mix of spaghetti western, martial arts film, exploitation flick and revenge driven drama, from a technical standpoint it, shouldn’t have worked, but it did.  Directed by Quinton Tarantino and starring Uma Thurman as the Bride, a woman who turns out to have been an assassin left for dead by her murderous  co-workers, the film was, and still is, a hell of a ride.

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8 – No Country for Old Men (2007)

Tommy Lee Jones is great as a small town Sheriff pulled into a game of cat and mouse between two men, one a drug dealer’s hired gun, the other an average guy who happens to find something that’s not his to take in west Texas circa 1980.  Directed by Joel and Etan Cohen, a “film” that’s actually deserving of all it’s hype.

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7 – Donnie Darko (2001)

Hauntingly disturbing, Richard Kelly’s dark sci-fi lullaby is actually a love story about destiny and divine intervention.  Staring then 19 year old Jake Gyllenhaal as a schizophrenic teenager coming of age in 1988, the cult classic never took off initially with critics or audiences due to it’s release date, Sept 14, 2001.  (I’ve always liked the underdog)

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6 – Quantum of Solace (2008)

Loves me some Daniel Craig.  He made James Bond a total bad ass again.  Picking up minutes after Casino Royale left off, the revenge driven story introduces us to a sinister organization called Quantum, a bevy of villains, including the completely loathsome Mr Green (brilliantly played by Mathieu Amalric) and a possible arc leading to the introduction of Blofield?  Time will tell.

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5.  The Bourne Identity (2002)

Did anyone ever picture Matt Damon as a lethal spy?  I sure didn’t.  Now I can’t picture anyone else in the role of Jason Borne but him.  Based on the books by Robert Lulum, the mystery unfolds as a man seeks to discover who he is while the trying to avoid being captured or killed by various Government and “black ops” organizations.  One of those cases were the sequels are just as good as the original (but the first one always stays with you).

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4 – The Incredibles (2004)

Pixar and Brad Bird’s brilliant ode to superheroes is amazing.  Half the fun for me was trying to figure out which Marvel or DC superhero the various characters that populate this world are based on.  It’s also a great story about family, and the villain of the piece gives an interesting line “When everyone is special, no one will be“.   Something to think about.

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3 – Requiem for a Dream (2000)

Completely dark as it is brilliant, Darren Aronofsky’s tale of addiction, delusion and ultimately, self destruction is film making at it’s best.  The four leads were fantastic in their roles as well.  I said I tend to like movies more than films.  This one is a true exception.

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2 - X2: X-Men United (2003)

The very rare sequel that’s actually better than the first movie (which was very good itself), and proof that Bryan Singer knows what he’s doing when it comes to these characters. Action, drama, humour, it’s all here in spades.  Directors of future superhero flicks, take note. 

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1 – The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

Peter Jackson pulled it off (while I’d say the whole trilogy is once giant, 12 hour movie, the obsessive compulsive within me will balk) and this introduction to Middle Earth and it’s main protagonists was and is remains, The Wizard of Oz of our generation.

So that’s a wrap.  Did I miss anything?  Agree?  Disagree?  Sound off in comments.  Love to hear from you.

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