Six years.  Six freaking years building up to something, anything and this is what we get?  

Epic fail.  

The series finale of LOST aired last night.  Amid much hype and promises of answers we got a sappy, anti-climatic mess that’s causing a lot of divison amongst fans. 

The debates are raging all over the internet with people either having loved it, hated it, or left feeling dissatisfied and cheated somehow.  (I’d mention the smug bastards who are gloating about how they didn’t get sucked in to begin with, but they don’t count).

Guess this is the result of writers painting themselves into a corner with no clear idea (despite their claims to the contrary) of what they were doing. 

Apparently, the ratings for the finale were 13 million.  Solid but not spectacular.  As for the two and a half hour running time, a whopping 45 minutes went to commercials.  That’s 45 minutes of my life that I will never, ever, get back.    

JJ Abrams and company better deliever on Super 8 next summer, or it’s over between us.

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The Golden Girl

The Silver Fox.

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Did Zoe Saldana do something to make her stylist mad at her?

This Givenchy dress looks great until you get below the waist, then it starts to resemble something that you’d find in RuPaul’s closet.

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Mo’Nique is going for that “nature girl” look on the red carpet again.   Guess she’s too busy to shave, or maybe her hubby likes her hirsute (shudder). 

Ironically, half the guys in attendence at last night’s awards ceremony probably have less hair on their legs than she does.

Excuse me, I have to go now and scrub my eyeballs with a Brillo pad and bleach.

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When was the last time she actually acted in something?  I can’t remember.

It’s getting to the point that Lindsay Lohan will show up to the opening of an envelope, never mind a Golden Globes after party.  She wasn’t at the awards ceremony itself, as there’s no category for cracked out tweets, melodrama, and career suicide.  Too bad, she’d be a shoe in.

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Here then,  a short list of hits and Mrs from last night’s red carpet

Loves me some Tina Fey, just not in that dress with those shoes.  Miss.

Catherine Henricks and the girls looked stunning, as usual.  Hit!

Where the hell did Quentin Tarantino get that outfit from, Vulcan?  What’s with the look on Reese’s face?  Is she mad because the rain did a number on her hair or she has to “share” a photo op?  Not sure I’m loving her dress here, the one she presented in was much prettier (this is what happens when your main gay and you part ways).  Miss x2

Lea Michelle from Glee.  (Looks like she’s lots of fun to be around too).  Miss.

Jane Lynch steps it up a notch from the track suit.  Hit!

Oh, Sookeh, what are you wearing?  Miss.

Bluntkinski.  Hit!

Chace Crawford’s hair and stubble.  Guy needs to embrace the pretty boy (both literally and figuratively) and stop trying so hard.  Miss.

Mad Men’s January Jones looked like a flapper going to a funeral.  Miss.

Because I promised myself I’d end this post on a positive note, Sandra Bullock pulling it off in purple.  Hit!

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Guess they thought it was a good idea at the time, but Gervais brought the snark with him in spades for his hosting duties.  Whether it was taking easy shots, “Guess I better get on with this before NBC replaces me with Jay Leno” to oh-no-he-didn’t moments such as when introducing the president of the HFPA, “…One thing that can’t be bought is a Golden Globe.  Offically” (pause as the audience’s collective intake of breath drops the air pressure in the room) “What!?  It’s not like I’m ever going to do this again anyway”, as well as introducing presenters in between taking swigs of something while on stage (I wonder if the FCC will fine NBC for that) “Here’s Jennifer Aniston and that bloke from 300″ and “I enjoy a drink as much as the next man, unless that man is Mel Gibson”, Ricky Gervais will go down as a memorable, if not completely charming host.

While some are complaining that he misread the audience, and left them cold, I thought he was a riot.  However, as his presence seemed to be cut somewhat as they evening progressed, something tells me Gervais won’t be hosting any more award ceremonies anytime soon.  Pity.

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I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, people looking for a real partner don’t go on reality shows seeking love, just attention and a possible jump-start to a career in famewhoring.  Shocking, I know! 

Apparently, there’s already been one upset on the show as a famewhore hopeful was sent home along with one of the crew for having had a “relationship” with the man. 

 This probably happens more often than the producers let on, but since word had already got out (those vying for the bachelor’s “affections” are a vicious bunch) ABC decided to milk it for all it’s worth.  Most! Shocking! Bachelor! Premiere! Ever! 

Then there are the non-witty bon-mots and play on words because bachelor Jake Pavelka’s a commercial pilot, besides the eye-rolling, stomach turning addition to the title The Bachelor : The wings of love (gag).  My responses to them, underneath.

“You should fasten your seatbelt, cause it’s gonna be a bumpy ride“. 

Peepers – There was only one Bette Davis, and your not.  Eject!

“Hopefully in the end I become your co-pilot.  I would love to be the, um..the passenger.  In your plane”. 

Peepers – Room on this flight is on “stand by” only.

“I hate to interrupt you, but your flight attendant is here”  

Peepers – Get out of my cockpit!

“You can land your plane on my landing strip anytime” 

Peepers – It’s called a Brazilian sweetie.  Learn it.  Live it.  Love it.

See what I mean?  Those are enough to send someone into a tail-spin (it’s easy) or pray for total engine failure (meh), or crash-land on a derserted island with no TV (ok, I think I’ll stop now).

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