Showing a modicum of common sense that she normally doesn’t display on Jersey Shore (yeah, yeah, it’s all in the editing), the transsexual Oompa Loompa has turned down possible stalker with rage issues and wanna be famewhore Jeff Mirranda’s marriage proposal, making sure we also know she’s single via her Twitter account.
Oooh. Burn.
So long Jeff, we hardly knew thee.
Talk about an indecent proposal.
Jeff Mirranda, the famewhore who’s been dating the transsexual Oompa Loompa of Jersey Shore for all of four weeks, is proposing to her on the new cover of Steppin’ Out magazine.
Lest you wonder if Steppin’ Out is lowering it’s standards with this, previous cover subjects include Danielle Staub (Real Housewives of New Jersey) and embittered Jon Gosselin cast-off Haley Glassman, so that would be a “no”.
More details about Jeff Miranda’s past have also come to light. Apparently an ex girlfriend had to put a restraining order on him for threatening to kill her and choking her. In Jersey Shore parlance, that’s considered foreplay.
Jeff says that after Snooki “deals with the shock, I think she’ll say yes”.
Egads. If Snooki does say yes (she’s just crazy enough to consider it), could a Jersey Shore Wedding Special be in the works? Cue apocalypse.
If ever anyone needed proof that life isn’t always fair, this would be it.
Mike Sorentino (aka The Situation) on Jersey Shore is estimated to make about $5 million by the end of 2010, according to the Hollywood Reporter.
As they’ve broken it down, The Sitch is earning about $60 thousand per epsidoe for the third season, and pulls in anywhere from $15 to $50 thousand per appearance. He’s also signed to shill for Vitamin Water, Reebok , produce a clothing line for Dilligaf, has a workout tape, a single on i-tunes, and reportedly has a six figure deal with Gotham Books to write his autobiography, Here’s the Siuation.
Who knew doing nothing but going to the boardwalk, clubbing and GTL (gym/tan/laundry) could be so lurative?
Cue countdown for inevitable Jersey Shore/Situation backlash any moment now (not to mention gold-diggers and lawsuits). It’s one thing to see people make total fools of themselves on TV, it’s another when they’re so successful at it, they become millionaires.
UPDATE – Better make that about $6 million. Word on the street as of late last night that the Sitch has signed on for the latest installment of Dancing For A Cheque With The Stars. Seems ABC is keen to get younger viewers interested in the show by signing up youth orientated reality stars (other rumoured additions include The Hills’ Audrina Patridge, R&B has-been Brandy, and NFL star Kurt Warner). The official line up will be announced August 30.
…If she hasn’t already.
The resident transexual Oompa Loompa of Jersey Shore kicked her last boyfriend to the curb for being a famewhore, yet it looks like history is repeating itself with her latest fling.
She’s now dating Jeff Miranda, a 24 year old Iraq war Vetran that she meet at Karma, one of the watering holes she and the other cast members go to get drunk and create mayham (all for the cameras, of course).
Apparently, Miranda has no interest whatsoever in being in front of the cameras (cough-bullsh*t-cough), having scored interviews with both Us and People, in which he told the later, ”If they offered me to be on the show over Nicole, I’d say no. I said, ’F*ck the cameras, let’s run away.’ I want people to stop hating. It’s not about fame, it’s about me being happy.”
Cue eye-roll.
Miranda fancies himself something of an aspiring actor, with a profile (since deleted) on GotCast.Com, a website devoted to helping people land bit parts in TV and film. Word is he auditioned for Jersey Shore back when producers were initally casting for the show, but didn’t make the cut.
This may have already run it’s course though. Word is Miranda hasn’t heard from Snooki since the weekend.
Slow news day!
Having absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that the third season of Jersey Shore is currently in production, Snooki’s one time “gorilla juice-head” ex-boyfriend Emilio Masella (whom she kicked to the curb when she got an inkling he might, just might, be using her to get famous), took a flight from LA to try to win back her affections.
According to Radar Online, who snagged an “exclusive” interview with Emilio, he and mentor Spencer Pratt (who paid for the flight) stopped filming the reality show Fist Pumping For Love because no one was interested in it he realized he loves Snooki and wanted to “rescue” her when she got arrested last week.
Uh-huh.
However, Snooki seems to have moved on and Emilio now says he can’t believe he travelled all this way to win her back (by making a spectacle of himself on the boardwalk giving away free hugs).
Bitch, please.
His motives are as transparent as prison bedsheets (and just about as besmirched).
The Earth begins to spin again.
After being arrested yesterday afternoon for drunk and disorderly conduct, Snooki (Guidette Minimus) was let go by the police with a summons a short while later.
Anthropoligists have found that the the Guidette Minimus is a creature of habit, so she’ll probably be at the beach again today working on her tan. Is that Sierra Brown or Burnt Orange?
Maybe those are the fashion police to take Snooki away for wearing a bedazzled “slut” t-shirt in public. You just know Vogue over-lord Anna Wintour would give her 40 years at hard labor on principal alone.
In a totally not staged set up publicity stunt to remind everyone that the second season of Jersey Shore is currently underway, cast-member Snooki was arrested for “disorderly conduct” on the beach in Seaside Heights NJ, earlier this afternoon while shooting scenes for the show’s third season.
Maybe I’m missing something, but isn’t Snooki (along with the rest of the cast), supposed to be disorderly? Isn’t that the whole point of the show??
Fear not, fellow cast-member J-Woww is apparently on her way (along with the camera crew) to bail Snooki out. No doubt this will end well.
MTV has finally (sort of) got around to replacing Angelina (Trash-Bags), the boring one who quit a couple of eps into the first season, only to come back for the second season and then quit again.
Meet Deena Nicole Cortese, a 23 year old from New Eygpt, NJ, and friend of Snooki’s. Little is known about her, except that she graduated high-school in 2005, and according to her now cancelled MySpace and Facebook profiles, she is “ADDiCTiVE & ExPENiIV3 LiK3 COCAiNE!” and all that she needs is “Beats, my broads, and booze”.
Is B3 the new GTL?
Undoubtedly, she’ll fit right in with the others. I give it two weeks before she’s either hooking up with The Situation or fighting with J-Woww.
Oh noes! Trouble brewing for the third season of Jersey Shore again already (maybe).
According to P6, the rest of the cast is fed up with Mike “The Situation Sorrentino’s ego, which is supposedly getting too big for the others liking. Considering they’re all shameless famewhores who got hired for being just that, this is as perplexing as it is ironic.
Apparently, the fact that The Situation was approached first when that salary dispute occured earlier this month didn’t help matters any either. Word is some members of the cast are going to try and drive him out.
Expect much more manufactured drama a’la The Hills for season three, which will be begin filming soon in Seaside Heights, NJ.
Whew, that was close! The world can start spinning again.
Word is the cast of Jersey Shore (minus the boring one who bailed) have all signed new contracts with MTV, giving each of them a 200% salary increase to $30k per episode for seasons three and four. Guess MTV is dropping the pretense of the second season being split into two parts for the contract ploy that it was.
Apparently, The Situation was the first to resign, followed by DJ Pauly D. Realizing which way the wind was blowing, Snooki, J-Woww (of the New Jersey Wowws) and the rest jumped on the bandwagon.
The second season begins on July 29th. GTL (gym, tan, laundry), Baby.
