So much for her staying out of trouble (at least peripherally) while on probation.

While Paris plans yet another reality show that will focus on the “real” Paris Hilton, which I assume is a lot like the pretend one we keep seeing, she was the passenger in creepy, gun totting boyfriend Cy Waits’ car while he drove over a paparazzi on Monday night.

Apparently while leaving a West Hollywood club, their car got swarmed by paps, after a few minutes, Cy gave the universal sign for “get the hell out of the way, we’re about to start moving” unfortunately one of the paps was too slow and got hit. Pap goes down!  Pap screams bloody blue murder! Pap calls cops! Pap sells story to tabloid!

Radar reports that after initially leaving the scene, Cy came back to take a breathalyzer and was issued a citation.  He’ll be due in court later this month.

Cue lawsuit in 5…4…3…

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Heh.

One time sex tape star, sometimes drug mule, and vapid celebutard Paris Hilton got the heave-ho from officials in Japan, where she had gone to launch her fall/winter 2010 line of clothing.

After arriving late Tueday night in her private jet, Paris was detained and questioned for six hours, before being denied entry to the country regarding her recent legal woes (Japanese laws regarding illegal drugs are quite strict).

Paris’ spokesminion released a statement saying ”Paris is very disappointed and fought hard to keep her business commitments and see her fans, but she is forced to postpone her commitments in Asia. Paris understands and respects the rules and laws of the immigration authorities in Japan and fully wishes to cooperate with them.”

Paris is currently enroute back to the US, where presumably she’ll have to be let back in.

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Drug mule and professional socialite Paris Hilton has reached an agreement with prosecutors in Las Vegas regarding her arrest last month in which she was found with .08 grams of cocaine outside the Wynn Resort.

In place of facing a felony conviction and jail time,  Paris has agreed to plead guilty Monday to two misdemeanors.  Paris will also pay a $2000 fine, serve 200 hours of community service, complete a drug abuse program, and be on probation for one year. 

Paris really will need to find a better place to hide her stash from now on.  No word with what’s happening to her creepy gun toting boyfriend Cy Waits, who was charged with DUI and lost his job in the wake of his arrest.  He should have known better.  Hurricane Paris destroys almost everything that she comes into contact with.

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… She must be, now that the heat is on.  Puts on sunglasses – cue music.

Word out tonight that Paris Hilton is being charged with felony possession of a controlled substance (cocaine).   According to the police report, Paris asked if she could go to the washroom, the cops said no problem but asked to check her purse first which is when they discovered the coke.  Even better, Paris said she thought the coke was initally gum when asked about it.

In addition to the .08 grams of coke, which Paris is now saying was planted into the purse that she initially claimed wasn’t hers, the cops also found a broken tablet of Albuterol, an asthma medication and a package of rolling papers.

You just know Paris was probably planning on flushing everything down the sh*tter and wasn’t counting on the cops searching her bag.  As for her gun toting boyfriend, Cy Waits, he’s been charged with DUI and has been sacked from that Vegas nightclub he ran (not so much the owner as a manager it turns out).

If Paris is found guilty, she could face up to four years in prison.

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You’d think that after getting caught twice this summer already she’d learn to hide her stash better. 

Paris was a passenger in a vehicle in Vegas, which was pulled over due to a “smoke trail” just outside the Wynn Hotel where her boyfriend owns a nightclub.  The driver was charged with DUI, and when the police searched Paris, they found a “substance” that turned out to be cocaine when tested.

Uh-oh.

Getting busted in South Africa and France for a little bit of weed is one thing (easier to pay off people) but getting caught with coke in the notoriously anti-drug US is another.

No word how much of the drug was found on Paris, but after being booked she was released on her own recognizance.  Anyone else sense a stint in rehab as part of a plea bargain deal coming up?

Update – Paris’ latest addition to her collection of Mug shots (what are we at now, five?  Apparently, Paris is using the classic “The purse wasn’t mine” defense.

Bitch, please.

Meanwhile, Paris’ lawyer released this unintentionally hysterical statement to the media. ”Paris Hilton was released this morning on her own recognizance. This matter will be dealt with in the courts not in the media and I encourage people not to rush to judgment until all of the facts have been dealt with in a court of law. There will be no interviews and no more comments at this time.”

Not rush to judgement?  Where would the fun be in that? 

.

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This is becoming a regular occurance for Paris the Heiress.

Just before the World Cup final last week, Paris got detained while in South Africa for possession of marijuana (gasps – clutches pearls in horror), but was released when her minion took the fall for her after Paris paid both the authorities and her minion off.

Now comes word via TMZ that Paris got caught on the island of Corseca off the coast of France with more weed (albeit less than a gram) while on her way to Italy yesterday afternoon.   

Apparently, Paris was detained briefly before being allowed to go on her merry way after yet another bribe.  

Although Paris denies any of this happened, me thinks the lady doth protest too strongly.  She also needs to find a better place to hide her stash while traveling.

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Even more drams in the game of love as celeb couples continue to break up for a variety of reasons.

Word via Page Six this morning that Paris Hilton has sent her boyfriend of two years Doug Reinhardt packing.  Apparently, the  last latest straw for Paris was when she found out hr was  pitching a reality show starring his sister, but using Paris’ name in order to generate interest.  Paris was not amused and kicked her famewhoring boyfriend to the curb. 

Considering how often Paris and Doug these fight and make up though, don’t write them off just yet (yes, I probably just ruined your weekend).

Not the lesbians! 

People is saying that rocker Melissa Ethbridge and her partner of nine years, Tammy Lynne Michaels, have called it quits after nine years.  Bummer.

No reasons for the split or details were given.  Melissa’s spokesminion gave the standard 411 regarding the split, saying “blah blah blah, saddened, blah blah, difficult period, blah, respect blah.”  (I’m paraphrasing here, but you get the idea)

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Celebutard Paris Hilton celebrated her 29th birthday at some club in LA and drama occurred when pal-ex-f*ck buddy Brandon (Greasy Bear) Davis, who showed up uninvited, and current squeeze Doug Reinhardt got into a pissing contest with each other.

Page Six says Reinhardt got into an argument with Hilton, apparently upset with all the attention she was getting at her own birthday party (how old is he, seven?) when Davis stepped in and a screaming match ensued. 

The end result of which saw Davis getting kicked out of the party, Reinhardt back in his girlfriend’s good graces by the end of the night, and Paris feeling (one assumes) a sense of affirmation since she caused something of a stir that would get mentioned in the media after months of irrelevance.

The bigger question is why are these people pseudo-famous and why am I posting about them when they all make my skin crawl?

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Those New Zealanders have a wicked sense of humour, don’t they?  Although Paris Hilton would beg to differ.  Apparently, the celebutard doesn’t appreciate her image being used to advertise vacant billboard space in Aukland, and has instructed her business manager Jamie Freed to contact her lawyers.

The company, Media5, which handles 70 advertising sites in Wellington and Auckland, say they weren’t using Hilton to endorse their billboards and that they “were just having a bit of fun”…she has a proven ability to laugh at herself”.  She does, but only as long as she’s getting paid to do it.

Should Hilton’s lawyers require her image to be removed, the company will cooperate.  “We’re not trying to offend anyone“, said Media5′s Adam McGregor.

If the image does end up being removed at her request, guess we can add “buzz-kill” to Paris’ repertoire.

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