Famous drunk person David Hasselhoff was voted of Dancing For A Cheque last night by viewers.  Bummer.

It came down to Kurt Warner (ex football player, personal friend of Jebus), Kyle Massey (don’t know, don’t care), The Situation (who given the chance, will end up coming in second to Jennifer Grey) and The Hoff.  

The Hoff handled the news with his usual aplomb, saying “”It’s been a great ride,” … “I feel bad for Kym [his dancing partner]because she worked hard trying to get me where I was going. I’m so proud that my daughters are here and they got to see me come this far.”

On the plus side with the Hoff’s departure from the competition, the network is now clear to put the hand sanitizer back out from under lock and key.

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At the rate “insiders” keep spelling the beans to the tabloids, there won’t be anyone left for ABC to out as a contestant by August 30 when the official announcement is made.

US is saying that ex-Baywatcher, current reality show patriarch, and famous drunk person David Hasselhoff will be a competing alongside Kristie Ally (Cheers, Veronica’s Closet, Fat Actress) who’s participation is being reported by InTouch.  According to them, Kirstie’s being paired with Maxsim Chmerkovskiry, who clearly drew the short straw for the fall season (I kid becuase I love). 

The new season of Dancing For A Cheque (let’s be honest, that’s exactly what it is) starts September 20.

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Tastes like chicken!

Apparently, Comedy Central is going to roast David Hasselhoff for a new special that is set to air August 15th.  Just how do you roast someone who’s career (if not life) already seems to be a parody of itself?  

The Hoff ‘s all for it, saying “I’m honored that Comedy Central is going to get ‘Hoff’ on me. I have always been a major fan of Roasts, dating back to the days of the Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts.  Laughter is the best medicine.  Bring it on! I’m ready to take the heat.”

No word if it’s open season with any and all topics regarding the Hoff, or if some (cough-alcohol-cough) will remain verboten.  Should be an interesting group  gathered to roast him.  You just know Pam Anderson will be there and say something completely inappropriate (which is kind of the whole point).

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Guess his stint in Celebrity Rehab with Dr Drew will have to wait for now.

A&E announced that David Hasselhoff will star in a 10 epsisode reality show revolving around raising his two teenage daughters wh0 are trying to break into show-business as singers while attending school.

The Hoff recently quit America’s Got Talent, saying he was leaving to do his own thing.  Looks like this is what he was referring to.

Produced by Freemantle Mantle (American Idol) the as yet untitled show (for your consideration, ”How About Those Hoffs?” as a possibility?) will apparently avoid dwelling on the Hoff’s battles with booze and his ex-wife.

No word yet from A&E as to when this show will air, other than later this year.  Now if the producers only promise to avoid focusing on the Hoff’s ”singing career” as well, we can all rest easy. 

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Ok, Simon Cowell didn’t really say that, but it was too catchy for me not to run with it.

Anyway…

David Hasselhoff has left America’s Got Talent to star in America’s Next Trainwreck his own TV show (cough-fired-cough) the details of which are yet to be announced.

In a statement, the Hoff said, “I am proud that I was part of making America’s Got Talent the No. 1 rated show for the past four summers. It’s been a rewarding experience and now I’m thrilled to be able to follow my dream to do my own TV show, which will be announced very shortly. I want to thank my friend, executive producer Simon Cowell, and everyone at NBC and Fremantle for the opportunity for four great years.”

Translation:  They caught me drinking the hand sanitizer again and kicked me to the curb.  KIDDING!

Until the Hoff shows up on his new show (Celebrity Rehab?) Tom Tom GPS users can get their Hoff fix as the first ever celebrity voice you can now down load from NavTones.com. 

No word yet on who’s going to replace the Hoff (Can you replace the Hoff?  I think not!), but someone tell Simon Cowell that Paula Abdul’s on line two for him.

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