Dear W Magazine, taking a surgically altered (because no way in hell that ass is real) nude famewhore and painting her silver is to “art” what an encounter between three strapping well endowed young men on Corbin Fisher is to family entertainment.
That is all.
The infamous White House Party Crasher and Real Housewives of DC cast member is planning to take it all off for an upcoming issue of Playboy.
TMZ is saying that Michaele is “very excited” (guess the highbeams are on) to be doing the photoshoot later this month and that she won’t pull a Levi Johnston, leaving nothing to the imagination. Words in English won’t be able to describe the horror.
Playboy isn’t sure if they’re going to put the 44 year old famewhore on the cover, but according to Michaele’s spokesminion, she “would love it”. Really? She seems so shy. Meanwhile, the people in the magazine’s art department are probably all sighing in resingnation and getting ready to pull double shifts photoshopping.
…that Spencer Pratt is shopping around for $5 million.
People have been questioning if the sex tape even exists or if this was just another attention seeking ploy (which seemed likely) with Spencer saying he was using the tape to blackmail Heidi into doing another reality show with him and to call off divorce proceedings, telling TMZ, “You cannot turn off the Speidi machine”. Spencer says that Heidi just embrace all this, as both she and he are “reality stars, not serious actors. She can’t think she’s Naomi Watts. She’s a tad delusional.”
Heh.
Spencer supposedly tricked Heidi into meeting him in Costa Rica to hand over their dogs to her (why would you travel thousands of miles to hand over a pet when you both live in the same city?) where he gave her the ultimatum. Oh noes!
Now that Vivid Entertainment has confirmed it’s real, saying it could even surpass the Kim Kardashian sex tape, as it includes some girl on girl action between Heidi and Playboy playmate Karissa Shannon. Karissa has warned he’ll sue if it ever is released.
Finally, Spencer’s protege, wanna be famewhore Emilio Masella (ex of Jersey Shore’s Snooki) told TMZ that he wishes he “did that with Snooki, but I’m still learning and wasn’t as smart as him”.
Now granted, Emilio Masella is probably as dumb as he looks, but you know the end of days are nigh when a wanna-be famewhore is looking up to Spencer Pratt as a role model.
Oh, hell to the no!
One day after announcing he was writing a tell-all about theirmaybe fake relationship, comes news via the harbingers of doom at TMZ that Spender Pratt is in negotiations with Vivid Entertainment to sell a sex tape featuring himself and his soon to be ex-wife, Heidi Montag.
No word when it was shot (pre or post plastic surgery over-kill) or what Heidi thinks of all this. Chances are this is just another ploy to get his name in the media (if so, well done), but if it’s for reals you just know that Spencer had Heidi sign some sort of release form.
I’m going to install an “unsee” function into my computer (now if only I could install one into my brain).
What? Again??
Is there anything worse than a self identified “celebrity blogger”? Seriously. Rather than comment on pop culture, some (if not all) become convinced that they are as famous (ok, given) and interesting (not really) as the people they blog about.
(Yes, I realize I’m sort of biting my own hand – bare with me, I’m leading up to something here).
Perez Hilton, celebrity blogger, famewhore, and total jackass has posted yet another questionable link to a picture of Miley Cyrus’ crotch region, from her performance at the MMVA’s last night.
The picture shows Miley’s crotch with a bit of flesh (don’t ask me what part, I’m a blogger, not a gynecologist) poking out from under her leotard.
Yawn….zzzzzzzzzzzz…
Needless to say, Perez hasn’t had this much press since he got punched in the face at an after party at last year’s MMVA’s so of course he’s at it again. Obviously, his lawyers have cleared thew way for him to do so otherwise he wouldn’t be doing it. Perez may be revolting and without any ethics, but he’s not stupid.
It’s been a busy few days for two of the cast members of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.
First it turns out Teresa Giudicie (the one that looks like a Neanderthal with a penchant for flipping dining room tables), and her husband Joe are almost $11 million dollars in debt. Apparently, they’re not as wealthy as they tried to appear on the show. SHOCKING!
Those buzzkills at the banks are said to be circling like vultures, and the Giudicie’s have already lost their summer place on Jersey Shore (the actual location, not the show) and another residence. Next to go is that $1.5 million dollar mansion they had custom built that was featured in the last episode of the show. If ever there was an award for overspending, these two would be on the short list.
Now comes word that Danielle (Prostituiton Whore!) Staub (the one that looks like a female version of the Joker) has a sex tape coming out next week. Of couse she does. Isn’t this par for the course at this point?
Word is Danielle tried to stop it last year (sure she did – you just know she wanted a bigger cut of the take, asumming there is one) but TMZ reports that Hustler is releasing the tape next Tuesday. The tape features Danielle and that 26 going on 40 looking douchebag she was dating briefly on RHONJ, Stephen Zalewski. Blech.
Both women are pobably toasting each other’s misfortune, self inflected as it is. No word if all this will somehow make it into season two of the show or if the fallout will have to wait until season three.
Just when we thought it was safe to watch Dancing With The Stars (that’s a joke -it never is) too.
Kate Gosselin announced on her TLC Blog late yesterday that she’ll be returning to the show for the finale.
“There better be one more dance left in me: Get ready for the DWTS finale on May 24, 25!!! I’ll be there. C’mon, I know you missed my unique dance style!”
Gotta say I’m conflicted. While I really miss being able to… critique Kate’s “unique” dancing style (it simply hasn’t been the same without her), it’s actually pretty painful to watch.
You just know news of this is going to push her ex-dancing partner Tony Dovolani right over the edge.
How did that Pussycat Dolls song go?
“Be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it….”
Poor Jon Gosselin (words I thought I’d never, ever type or say).
First, psychotic ex-girlfriend and wanna-be famewhore Hailey Glassman announces to the world that he’s hung like a nine year old (classy!), and went on to post a photo on Twitter claiming it was his penis (since taken down). I didn’t look myself, as my eyeballs and retinas can only take so much abuse.
Now Playgirl has come calling, offering Jon $20 k to get nekkid for a photo shoot. Apparently in the highly unlikely event that Jon agrees to do it (although a cheque is a cheque) and his overlords and TLC sign off on it, it’ll be more of lark than anything else .
Playgirl spokesminion Daniel Nardicio says if Jon’s interested he should do it. “I said maybe $20,000 maybe for the novelty factor. No offense, but I don’t think he’s that attractive. People aren’t going to be like, ‘Ooh, it’s going to be a hot shoot.’ I doubt he will do it but I’m sure he would love the attention that Levi got. It would be hilarious, but I’m not going to offer him that much.”
.
Pam struts down the catwalk floor
Sex appeal oozing from every pore
Richie Rich had his A-Muse fashion show last night in NYC and his partner in crime and model Pamela Anderson was on the runway strutting her, uh….stuff.
WTF?
This looks like something that was pulled from the costume department that was last worn for that sh*tty TV version of Buck Rogers about 30 years ago. I hate myself for looking, yet cannot turn away.
If the this is any indication, I can’t wait to hear the record Richie Rich and Pam were supposed to do together which has her singing.
