She’s probably wondering why she didn’t think of this particular road to famewhoring herself before, since it’s gotten her what she craves the most, exposure in the media.

Anyway, someone had the bright idea of having Tila Tequila sing at the 11th annual gathering of the Juggalos in Illinois over the weekend.

Juggalos are the hard core fans of the rap group Insane Clown Posse.  Need I explain more?  Once Tila came onstage to “perform” she apparently was hit repeatedly with bricks, fire-crackers, beer bottles and poo.  MC Tom Green did his best to distract the Juggaros, but having smelled blood in the proverbial water, they ignored Green for Tila.  Apparently, members of the ICP warned Tila things could go badly for her beforehand, “but she didn’t care”. 

Tila arrived back at LAX today, batterd and bruised, but not bowed.  After all, what are a few cuts and bruises when you get to make the interview circuit, TMZ, E!, Radar playing the victim card?  She hasn’t had this much press since her fake pregnancy then adoption last winter.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

This just made my morning. 

According to Radar, even though she was one of the higher profile celebrities (which says it all) for the current season of Dr Drew’s infamous exersise in schadenfreude, word is the good Doctor realized that Tila’s main problems are that  (A) she’s addicted to attention and (B) is bat-sh*t crazy.

Apparently, the final straw for the good doctor was when Tila blamed her alter-ego “Jane” for cutting and burning her arms.  Realizing he was in way over his head with this one, Dr Drew had her tossed out, free to terrorize LA once again with her famewhoring shenanigans.

No word if how or if this will affect production of Celebrity Rehab, or if they plan on replacing Tila with a less trainwrecky trainwreck.

Cue countdown for one of Tila’s patented online tirades against Dr Drew in 5…4…3…

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…Since I put a kibosh on posting anything about Tila Tequila.  However, all good things must come to an end, and since she actually did something somewhat post worthy (as opposed to making sh*t up to get attention) here we are.

Apparently, Tila has a music career of some sort and has been working on an EP, called of all things “The Edge of Darkness”.  I haven’t heard anything from it nor do I wish to.  I’ve already exposed myself this year to Heidi Montag, Countess Luann, and Lindsay Lohan my ears can’t take any more.  Seriously.  

Anyway, Tila put on a concert at the release party for it Wedensday night in LA.   You know your event is a wash when the biggest name in attendence is some American Idol cast off from a previous season.  

As you can see Tila’s brought her A game (well, A game for her) for the red carpet.  Now that’s glamorous.

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For all of two seconds, then goes back to her favorite topic, herself.

Remember when Chris Brown asked fans to publicly support him last week? 

Do you think this is what/who he had in mind?

Me neither.

How long before Tila decides Chris is the father of her fake baby (she’s apparently taken to appearing in public with a pillow or body suit)?

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It’s the only thing she does anymore.

To the surprise of absolutley nobody, Tila Tequila confirmed she’s not preganant on her Twitter account over the weekend, while having one of her patented Tweet-outs during which she also claimed that she had hit her head and was suffering from a major concussion, then posing as her publicist, asking for people’s prayers, telling people she wasn’t “doing well”.

If your going to pretend to be someone else while tweeting at least change your writing style and wording.  Cripes. 

Look for a barrage of Tila Tequila f*ckery over the next two weeks while the Winter Olympics are on.   Latest claims?  She’s now adopting orphans from Russia (it was Haiti before, but guess that’s so like, last week).

I’m going to issue a challenge to myself (and any other bloggers out there that may read this)  No Tila Tequila posts, mentions or photos until March 3rd.   I’m curious to see what a famewhore does when deprived for a couple of weeks of their drug of choice.  Attention.

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That sure didn’t take long.

Que the countdown for someone to stamp a code 5150 on the mess that is Tila Tequila, meaning she gets carted off to the psych ward to see if she actually poses a threat to herself or to others.

After quitting Twitter in a huff earlier this week, the famewhore and certifiable whack-job returned to the fold in all her delusional, self promotional glory.

According to her ramblings, her non-existent baby daddy and she are still bumping uglies and she might be falling for him, but he can’t tell anyone who he is because he doesn’t exist signed a non-disclosure agreement.  Guess this means rapper The Game can breathe easy now that he’s off the hook.

Tila also tweeted that she’s looking for her next baby daddy, saying she’s returned to men, even though she still considers herself a lesbian. (!?)

Then again, is she really nuts or crazy like a fox?  Tila had slandered quarterback Shawne Merriman in a previous online rant after accusing him of pulling a Chris Brown on her last summer (charges were never laid after a brief investigation) and is now being sued by the NFL star for $2 million.

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People of Earth rejoice!

Showing remarkable restraint, maturity and thoughtfulness (sarcasm) Tila Tequila joined the ranks of the TwitterQuitters Miley Cyrus and Chris Brown and deleted her account yesterday.

Why?  Apparently because we’re all a bunch of hating haters who hate.  And Twitter‘s racist.  Or something.

Tila Tequila, who used Twitter to make the most outlandish claims, (the latest being she’s adopting Haitian orphans) to get attention, and try to pick fights with other celebrities, was probably told to cool it by none other than Joe Francis.  Word is he’s her new handler for all PR related issues (her old one quit and was last seen running through the streets screaming something about being “free at last”). 

Tila’s apparently still famewhoring by blogging on her website, in long, incoherent rants written all in caps. 

Trust me, we haven’t heard the last from this bat-sh*t crazy famewhore, not by a longshot.

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It’s a paternity thing.  Well, maybe not.

Deciding that keeping everyone guessing who the pretend Baby-Daddy of her fake pregnancy was had run it’s course in less than 24 hours,  Tila Tequila announced yesterday that it’s none other than rapper The Game (aka Jayceon Taylor).

Tila says that he gave her the go-ahead as the identitywould eventually come out anyway.  The Game on the other hand, doesn’t want to play Tila’s paticular brand of pretend, Tweeting “Just left TMZ settin the record straight, my gyrl aint like that Tila Tequila sh*t !”

What’s the world coming to when men won’t admit to fathering fake babies?

Then on the flip side of yet another possible paternity showdown, Star Magazine is claiming that Michael Girgenti, an aspiring model/rapper/famewhore who also goes by the name Premo Stallone (eye-roll), is demanding a paternity test on Mason Dash Disick, Kourtney Kardashian’s baby.

Star Magazine gleefully reported last month that Premo just might possibly be the kid’s biological father when he answered, “Yeah, you could say that” to the question, “Do you think there’s any chance that you could be Mason’s father”? 

 Apparently, Premo and Kourt hit it once while she and Scott were on the outs, then she realized she was pregnant, assumed it was Scott Disick’s child and the they got back together (just like it was written for them in the script for their show).

Whether or not Premo is actually demanding a paternity test, or is simply looking for more attention to help launch his career remains to be seen.  Another possibility is that the tabloid’s just pilfering quotes from Premo Stallone’s previous interview and re-packaging them as a new story in order to sell copy.  Nah, they would never do something like that.

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Proving that she’s a one trick pony, Tila Tequila has again taken to Twitter claiming she’s pregnant(for reals this time), offering proof in the form of a photo of the ultrasound to the highest bidder.

So far, so takers (she’s pulled this twice before) so now she’s upping the goods promising that the baby daddy is a “very famous rapper! very very famous!” who is supposedly multi platinum, award winning, sexy, and tends to get into trouble.  Well, that narrows the field down doesn’t it? 

Wasn’t she just alluding that the non-existent fetus’ sperm donor was Girls Gone Wild douchebag Joe Francis (ugh, can you imagine if that’s true, even Tim Tebow would his stance) and promising that she was going to quit famewhoring to concentrate on being a mother?

Cue the countdown to her tragic miscarriage coincidentally happening just when she should be starting to show.

.

Also proving to be a one trick pony as well, Michael Lohan (who starting to resemble a turtle) has yet again been arrested for ignoring a court order to keep away from his ex-girlfriend and contacting her by phone.  He pulled this sort of thing with ex-wife Dina as well. 

At least we know Lindsay comes by it honestly and never really had a chance for normalcy getting her genes from the likes of this. 

No word on how Lohan’s latest arrest over contacting his ex is sitting with his new girlfriend and Jon Gosselin cast-off, Kate Major.

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Kim Kardashian, realizing that it had been at least 20 hours since her name appeared somewhere in the media, panicked and leaked “untouched” photos of herself from some shoot modeling bikinis, calling them “hot” and “edgy”. 

Kim also pretended to be worried about how she looked, fishing for compliments by complaining that she ate too much prior to the shoot.  Oh Kim, a couple of Quicktrim pills and a 12 hour stint sitting on the toilet crapping it all away will do wonders.  Doesn’t it always?

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Hardly. 

If she couldn’t keep the dogs, I doubt this will work out for her either.

Proving that she’s determined to become as big a thorn in side of the Johnson family as possible, or perhaps seeking payback for their supposed involvement in getting her interview on Larry King Live cancelled, Tila Tequila announced to Extra! that she’s going to seek custody of Casey Johnson’s daughter, telling them, “Her last wish was to have Ava, have me have Ava.”

Yeah, an attention starved Twitter addict, that’s in all probability a manic depressive prone to outbursts and bizarre claims (this being one of them) really has a shot at gaining custody of the daughter of a woman she was supposedly engaged to, but actually knew for less than a month.

Casey Johnson’s death is still being investigated, with the cause still pending, but it seems likely that her diabetes, which she had since she was a kid, was a factor. 

Regardless of the cause, I can’t help but get the feeling that Tila Tequila’s sudden involvement in Casey’s life was the final “gotcha” the heiress left for her family, with whom she seems to have had an acrimonious relationship with.

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