Cringe worthy pretty much sums it up.  I wasn’t sure who to feel more embarrased for, as I was too busy feeling sorry for myself having to watch it.

Anyway.

There’s a non scandal/controversy that people are talking about this morning.  Surprisingly, it’s not Nikki Minaj’s apparent lack of skill lip-synching (did Britney Spears teach a course?), it’s Black Eyed Pea will.i.am’s choice of costume when he performed with her.

Apparently, a black man wearing black makeup with an all black outfit constitutes black-face in some circles.  According to UsWeekly, the singer got called everything from a “racist” to someone saying that he set the human race “back 1000 years” on Twitter.

will.i.am took to his  Twitter, asking the bitchers and whiners if they were being serious (a sense of humour isn’t their strong point – just sayin’) adding that they should chose things that they “bark about” a little more carefully with there being far more relevant things to get offended by.

Like the overall mediocraty of the pre-show, perhaps?

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Anyone else find it kind of ironic that a network that barley plays music videos anymore in favor of crap-tastic reality TV programming still has an wards show dedicated to the medium?

Anyway, at this point it’s a foregone conclusion that Chelsea Handler won’t be back to host next year’s awards show, or any other for that matter.  Granted, she wasn’t given much to work with fresh out of jail rehab Lindsay Lohan in a pre-taped skit for example, but when your so-so opening is the best part of your hosting duties, your in trouble.

Usher and his little protege the Bieb showed up on the red carpet together (creepy dynamic) and both performed separate numbers during the show. Usher blew the crowd away singing OMG and his new single, DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love Again (great tune), while the Bieb, who’s voice is starting to change, relied on canned music and vocals, even though he had a “drum solo” in which he lost one of the drum sticks several seconds into his performance.  No matter though, his followers on Twitter all gave him props for his “amazing performance”.  Snort.

Speaking of the Bieb, he also won for Best New Artist for the video Baby, and had trouble finding the stage when he went to accept the award.  Cripes, this kid is stupid.  

Since the Bieb won for Best New Artist about a year and change after appearing out of nowhere, I’m betting rapper Drake wins it next, even though by that point his album will have been out for over a year and he’ll have been making music for almost two.  Such is the time delayed pop-culture relevance of award shows.

Other winners include Jay-Z and Alicia Keys, who’s video Empire State of Mind won for Best Cinematography, Jared Leto’s band 30 Seconds To Mars video Kings and Queens was named for Best Rock Video, and the Black Keys won Breakout Video for Tighten Up.

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Innocent? 

Meh.  Boring is more like it.  Granted, I didn’t expect Taylor to storm out on stage and be all, “Is that asshole here?”  (although it would have been fun to watch).

Had Taylor gone along the lines of Monologue Song, from when she hosted SNL last year, it would have been far better (not to mention shorter).

Once agian, she got upstaged by her nemisis Kanye West.

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…For better or for worse.

Wearing an all red outfit which contrasted beautifully with the white set, Kanye returned to the scene of his crime to sing Runaway to close the VMA’s

Some of the lyrics are as follows.. “Let’s have a toast for the douchebags. Let’s have a toast for the assholes. Let’s have a toast for the scumbags. Let’s have a toast for the jerkoffs. Baby, I got a plan. Runaway fast as you can.”

Clever no?  Kanye basically cops to being a dick, while more or less saying at the same time, “hate me all you want to, but life without me would be far less interesting”. 

Well played Kanye, well played.

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This appearance probably took some heavy duty logistics. 

Marshall Mathers (aka Eminem) opened the MTV VMA’s last night with I’m Not Afraid, (which also won for Best Hip Hop Video and Best Male Video) before switching  into Love The Way You Lie, where he was joined on stage by Ronald McDonald in his first appearance since losing the make-up and having a sex changeRihanna.

Em didn’t stick around after his performance to pick up his awards though.  Once done, he was whisked off to LAX to catch a flight to New York City where he’s performing in a concert with Jay-Z (for the first time) at the new Yankee Stadium tonight.

Word is tickets are going for over $13 000 for the best seats (makes you wonder what scalpers are asking).  I’m not the biggest fan of rap or hip hop, but I woudn’t mind seeing this one for myself.  The energy would should be amazing.

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She didn’t exactly sweep the MVA’s but she didn’t leave empty handed either.  Picking up eight moon-men out of thirteen nominations, Lady Gaga changed outfits three times, met Cher (who’s still got it), cried, and gave us the name of her upcoming album.

Gaga said she had promised herself she’d give it up if she won video of the year, which she did for Bad Romance.  After accepting the award she let it slip, “Born This Way” and even sung a few bars of the title track.

Other categories Lady Gaga won include…

Best Dance Video – Bad Romance

Best Colaboration Video – Telephone (with Beyonce)

Pop Video – Bad Romance

Female Video – Bad Romace

Best Choreography – Bad Romance

Best Direction – Bad Romance

Best Editing – Bad Romance

I’m just sort of surprised Telephone (which I personally think is actually better than Bad Romance) wasn’t shown more love.  What do you think ?

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Looks like The Donald was right after all.

Confirming speculation and rumour, CNN announced that Piers Morgan will be replacing semi-mummified geriatric sex symbol Larry King as the host of a as yet to be named show in the 9pm slot.

Since Larry’s show was called Live why not Livelier, since Piers is much younger?  No?  Ok, I’ll keep working on it.

Piers is probably best known for being a judge on America’s Got Talent and winning Celebrity Apprentice a few years ago.  In a statement, Piers says he’s “thrilled to be joining CNN” blah, blah, blah, “biggest and best TV news organization” blah, blah, ” passionate and relentless search for the truth” blah, “filling the legendary suspenders of the man I consider to be the greatest TV interviewer of them all”.

I hope Piers doesn’t fawn over his guests like that, it’ll cause rampant tooth decay and nausea.

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Dubbed in some quarters as The Gay Housewives of New York, Logo‘s upcoming The A List looks like it could move gay rights back 25 years.

Orginally going with the name “Kept” until producers realized no one wanted to cast themselves with a title that basically said “I’m gold-digger”, the new reality show features five horrible gay people and self identified A -listers in New York City as they shop, fight, backstab, and preen for the camera.

The two most recognizable faces in this group of “boys who brunch” would be Mike Ruiz (top, center), a 44 year old celebrity photographer based out of LA who’s worked with high profile celebs and magazines.  Reichen Lemkuhl (far left) is a sort of hot but kind of annoying professional famewhore that won The Amazing Race several years back with his then partner Chip.  After Chip and he were done and Reichen had gone through his winnings, he hooked up with Lance Bass for a while.

Rodiney Santiago (is that his real name? second from left) is a hot Brazilaan piece dating Reichen while he tries to launch a modeling career.  Austin Armacost (the one with the ball in the pool) is supposedly a model turned “fashion connoisseur” and is known for briefly dating Marc Jacobs a few years ago.  Ryan Nickulas (far left) is the owner of a hair salong and if the trailer was any indication the the most fa-la-la-la-fabulous! member of the cast.  Last but not least, Derek Lloyd Saathoff is a former model turned agent (early word is he’s the one to watch as the trainwreck show progresses).

Logo is calling the show The A-list New York, meaning if it’s a hit, L.A., Chicago, or Miami could be next.  And in case your wondering, of course I’m going to watch.

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Andy Cohen strikes again.  The fun and games begin October 16 on Bravo (USA). 

Apparently, Kellsey Grammer will be on several times visiting his ex, gold-digger and plastic surgery aficionado Camille Donatacci (second from left).  No word if Paris Hilton’s going to show up to visit her aunts, Kim and Kyle Richards (second and third from the right) during the season, or what impact her recent legal woes will have on any appearances she may have already taped.

This should prove to be the (totally scripted) trainwreck to end all trainwrecks.  I’ll watch (but hate myself afterwards for it).

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I wasn’t sure when it started last night, but it’s actually quite funny, even for a crusty gay like myself who’s not big on musicals.  (Shocking, I know).

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