Turning heads (and stomachs) since they first hooked up last winter, Eli and Peaches are now past tense.

Maybe it was the age difference, but far more likely, once the thrill of bumping uglies with each other finally wore off, Eli realized they just didn’t have that much in common, let alone much to talk about it.

Paris Hilton has depth compared to Peaches (Tweet below not withstanding).  Just sayin’…

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To the surprise of no-one, the geriatric crooner and worlds most awkward dancer since Kate Gosselin was given his walking papers tonight in a clear cut case of self defense for that mess that was supposed to be a jive.  It’s been downhill for Michael ever since he cut his hair.

In other DWTS news, turns out the audience was booing at the score given to Jennifer Grey and Derek Hough for their performance and not at Mama bear Sarah Palin (or at least that’s how it was edited to look/hear).

What makes this all the more interesting is that ABC went to the trouble of trying to clear up any question about it.  Looks like someone at the network wants to keep the Palin clan happy.  Do they know something we don’t?

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Remember that post the other day about Katy Perry singing “Hot & Cold” with an apparently traumatized Elmo?

Well the fuddy-duddies out there got their collective tits (pun intended) into a knot over Katy’s dress, even though it didn’t show as much boobage as originally thought due to flesh coloured mesh. 

Yeah, I don’t get it either.  Why cover up your boobs in the first place if your going to make it look like your not?  Weird (not to mention pointless).

Long story short, the producers took heed of parents concerns and won’t show the clip after all.  Instead, they’re going to have Ernie and Bert sing “I Feel Pretty” with Adam Lambert while making out with him.

Ok, I totally made that last part up.

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 The cast member of ABC sap fest Brothers & Sisters is now back together with his family of four kids and wife Rosetta, after spending much of 2008 puplically screwing around with village bicycle and sometimes actress Sienna Miller.  Sienna eventually broke it off with Balty, going through another couple of guys before hooking up again with Jude Law last year.  Long story short. 

Now Balty and his wife have been interviewed in Harper’s Bazaar, qouted as saying, “Here’s the bottom line: It was a very challenging time for everybody involved. But I loved and missed my family too much not to make it work. Rosetta is understanding enough and spiritual enough to let us try.”

Bitch, please.  “Understanding and spiritual” my ass.

Balty is a Getty.  Getty money obviously trumps Getty indescretions.  Rosetta probably decided that a new fall wardrobe, jewels, car, vacation, and pretty much any damn thing she wants for the foreseeable future makes her very public humiliation that much easier to swallow.

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Guys from the Bieb’s road crew were eating at the Hooters in the West Edmonton Mall when they promised the girls the Bieb in exchange for copping a feel got talked into getting the Bieb to come in for a photo op. 

Cue countdown for (A) outraged parents bitching about the inappropriateness of the Bieb going to Hooters in the first place, and (B) a hit put on the girls in this photo by jealous 10 to 13 year olds.

source

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Well!  Absolutely no one (meaning absolutley everyone) saw this one coming.

After hiding out in Costa Rica for the past few weeks and getting himself busted for gun possession, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag have reconciled.  It was during Spencer’s all to brief ordeal (he was only held for a few hours) that the two supposedly reconciled.  We can all breath a sigh of relief now that their impending divorce is now “on hold”.

As for that sex tape that Spencer was trying to sell to Vivid Entertainment, there’s been no further info regarding it.  Meanwhile, that Playboy playmate that Heidi fooled around with for the sake of the camera is now in talks with Vivid to have the sex tape she made with her Oxycontin selling boyfriend Sam Jones III released.

As for Speidi, I’m sure they’ll find some way to get mentioned in the media again before too much time passes, although at this point, anything short of murder probably will only register as a blip.

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Anyone who’s not a fan of talent shows such as American Idol or America’s Got Talent may want to send legendary rocker and notorious grouch Lou Reed a thank you card.

Apparently, Susan Boyle, the runner up who wowed everyone with her rendition of I Have A Dream on Britain’s Got Talent a couple of years ago, was all set to perform Perfect Day on America’s Got Talent, when word came down that Lou was denying her permission to use his song, as he’s ”not a fan”. 

Ouch.

TMZ says that Su-Bo, who’s supposedly something of a fragile basket case, is now en-route back to the UK, completely devastated over Lou’s refusal to share.

The lesson here is never count on a cranky old to play nice, and always have a plan B to fall back on.

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After hearing that the judge called Jersey Shore’s Snooki a “rude, self indulgent, Lindsay Lohan wanna be”, (see below post for all the details) when sentencing the transsexual Oompa Loompa for being a drunken mess on a public beach earlier today, Dina issued a statement to the gossip site saying, “The family is very disappointed that a judge would say that in a court of law.”

Dina has a right to be miffed as that judge was totally off base.  Snooki is nothing like Lindsay.  She’s not blonde, way shorter (not to mention orange), and her employment prospects are much better.

Also: Did I call this one or what?

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The owner of that RV company that Taylor Lautner is suing for failure to deliver his custom made trailer on time has an interesting response to the lawsuit.

Brent McMahon says that’s he’s willing to settle the dispute by having a pushup contest with the 18 year old actor while shirtless.  If McMahon wins, he says he’ll donate $40 grand to the Children’s Hospital of Orange County instead of paying Taylor damages, otherwise they’ll go to court.

So who do you think has te Taylor Lautner fixation?  McMahon, his wife, or some other family member?

Lautner’s legal counsil, Robert Barta isn’t having any of this, saying in a statement “McMahon RV’s response to our client’s legitimate claim further demonstrates the lack of professionalism that Mr. McMahon, his company and his employees have exhibited from the outset, and that compelled the filing of this lawsuit in the first place.”

Barta went on to say if McMahon donates the money to a charity of Taylor’s choosing (with no push-up contest) they’ll considered the matter closed.

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The Hip Hop world was all aflutter yesterday as news broke that rapper Drake (Gabriel Drake Aubrey or that kid in the wheelchair from Degrassi) and Niki Minaj both Tweeted that they had gotten married.

“Please refer to @nickiminaj as Mrs. Aubrey Drake Graham and dont stare at her too long. She’s finally mine. .”

“Baby u scared?”

Hmmm.  Real deal or publicity stunt?

Spokesminions for both say that the Tweets aren’t true and the couple isn’t married while his “people” try to convince Drake to get an annulment and have an iron clad prenup in place first, just yanking the chains of their fans and the media.

Oh.  Burn?

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