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Long time coming.

You know you’ve hit the big league when Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the team behind the so-stupid-they’re-funny Date Movie, Epic Movie, Disaster Movie, and Scary Movie franchise have turned their collective attention to your property. 

Should also be intersting to see how the Twi-freaks, who’s obsession also gets spoofed, react to this latest insult (it won’t be pretty).

Having seen The Twilight Saga: Eclipse myself on Thursday (Note: never sit in a chilly theatre for two hours plus when your already battling a cold), I can honestly say that the latest installment would be hard to parody, since it’s so bad it’s almost a parody of itself, if that makes any sense. 

However, if anyone’s up to the challenge, it’s Freidberg and Seltzer, who also take shots at current pop culture notables Jersey Shore and Lady Gaga, among others.  Vampires Suck opens next month.

Haters to the left right.

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Does the Beib even know what or where North Korea is for that matter?  

Apparently, the Beib’s official website had a contest for fans to vote where they wanted to send the pint sized singer on his upcoming ”My World” tour.

Jokers rigged voting for North Korea (guess Hell wasn’t an option), making it the number one location with over 659 000 votes when the polls closed.   Israel came in at number two, followed by Poland, Turkey, and Columbia.

The Bieb’s spokesminions have yet to respond about the hacking, or announce which location is the legitmate winner for the contest.

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This one’s going to get nasty.  I can tell.

Yesterday, Ely Canalis, George Clooney’s Italian piece, re-tweeted a message to her feed that read “sto sfogliando il nuovo Rolling Stone. Iggy Pop in copertina è il sosia di Jennifer Aniston.”

Re-tweeting means you either think the message is funny or you support it’s content.  Here’s that Tweet in English. “I’m flipping through the new Rolling Stone. Iggy Pop on the cover is the double of Jennifer Aniston.”

BAM!

Now, of course Brad Pitt is a good friend of gorgeous George, and Aniston as everyone knows is his ex.  Do you think George and Ely had a “discussion” over her re-tweeting that post?  Awkward.  

By the way, the original Tweet that started all this was still on  Ely’s Twitter earlier this morning.  Dumb (although that’s apparently how George likes ‘em).

No word from Aniston’s camp.  Yet.   Although Jen may want to ease up on the sun worshiping a bit, otherwise…well, you know….

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Tiger Woods’ ad for Nike, where his deceased father is speaking to him using audio from a 2004 interview, was ripe for parody given it’s serious tone.

Now comes the ad with Christian Bale’s infamous rant from the set of Terminator: Salvation a couple of years back.

Brilliant.  (Bale’s never going to live that down is he?)

BTW Tiger ended up finishing fourth overall, (disapointing but hardly a fail)and says he’s now going to take a “little time off to reevaluate things“. 

What?  Already??  Didn’t he just get back?

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By wishing his detractors get ass cancer.

Penn brought a bunch of doctors and medical supplies down to Haiti to help with relief efforts after the earthquake.  This being the cynical 10′s though (I’m trademarking that saying , so don’t steal it) some questioned his and other celebrities motives, saying it was a PR stunt to look better, and that it was hypocritical to help people in need then return to their mansions back  home. 

In an interview with CBS’ Sunday Morning, Penn responded to those allegations saying, “I guess I’ve been so away from it all– and our tent camp in Haiti that I haven’t had an awful lot of time to pay attention to them. You know, do I hope that those people die screaming of rectal cancer? Yeah. You know, but I’m not going to spend a lot of energy on it.”

Heh. 

You know, regardless of his intentions, the fact is Penn’s done way more to help than most of us have (or are able to), so unless his critics brought more relief to Haiti than he did and sold their houses to give the proceeds to charity as well, they should muzzle it.

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It would have saved her a lot of grief.

As for PETA’s ad itself, there’s no way any media company that owns billboards is going to let this appear on one of their properties and have a potentially expensive lawsuit on their hands.

Much like the infamous Mancrunch TV spot that was submitted (and rejected) for the Superbowl, PETA ensures it’s message is picked up via various media outlets (like this one) that mention the story without actually buying any advertising space. 

Crafty.

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I’d imagine so is she.

Behold the glamour that is Jon Gosselin’s cast off, would be famewhore Hailey Glassman on the cover of some free-be magazine for the lucky residents of New York. 

In Hailey’s intellectually stimulating interview, she continues to trash Jon, (like, let it go already) but since he’s her only claim to fame, she’s still playing the victim card.  Showing a total lack of irony, Hailey calls Jon a “textbook sociopath” and like a young teenage girl who puts out for a boyfriend only to realize it wasn’t really love, goes on ad nausem about Jon’s “tiny” penis, and how she thought he’d never cheat on her because of it.

Needless to say, her current, and quite possibly last boyfriend ever (if she has one) is probably wondering how she’ll respond once he dumps her ass as well.

As for her absolutely stunning ensemble, looks like J-Woww’s (Jersey Shore) clothing line has already launched.

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Oh.  SNAP.

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs took a not so subtle swipe at Sarah Palin earlier today over her speech this weekend ridiculing Obama as a “charasmatic guy with a teleprompter” while forgetting that she had visible crib notes written in her hand.

Somewhere out there, Levi Johnston is laughing.

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On the View yesterday, during a discussion of the whole Tiger Woods debacle and the seemingly endless parade of  women that are coming forward with tales to sell, the topic turned to Skanky Ho #1 in all this, Rachel Uchitel.

Joy Behar made the crack “Uchitel she’s a hooker?” 

oh, SNAP.

Well!  Faithless Hussy isn’t about to take this lying down, which is surprising since that’s clearly how she does her best work.  In a statement released Thursday night, Faithless Hussy’s attorney, Gloria Allerd, said without a trace of  irony “This statement was very hurtful to Rachel because it is not true.  Even if the host said it in a joking way Rachel is not amused, because she values her reputation and her reputation has been damaged by this statement as it is completely false.”

Cue the sound of hysterical laughter.  What reputation does Faithless Hussy  have left to value/damage exactly?  If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and acts like a duck, it’s a skanky ho.

Hopefully, Behar responds in some unique way.

UPDATE – A spokesminion for the View issued an apology of sorts to Faithless Hussy this afternoon, saying in a statement, “Joy Behar made a play on Ms. Uchitel’s name.  This was intended as a joke. We sincerely apologize for the choice of words and for any misimpression the joke may have created.”

That’s about as good a “mea culpa” Faithless Hussy is going to get from camp Behar, me thinks.

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The best thing about Martha Stewart, besides her unattainable standards for everything from the simplest of household tasks to throwing the most lavish of parties, is her gracious but thinly veiled bitchery.

The perfectionist, well known for not suffering fools or mincing words (thought I’d say something about mincing pies there, didn’t you?), told Nightline during a recent interview that Rachael Ray’s new book wasn’t up to the Martha Stewart standard.  “She just did a new cookbook which is just a re-edit of a lot of her old recipes…that’s not good enough for me.”

Ray basically pulled a “whatever Martha” in response, saying she’d much rather eat Martha’s recipes than her own.  Someone needs to have a talk to her about self promoting one’s own product, instead of another’s.  

Next, Martha was asked why she thought Sarah Palin was such a polarizing figure by CNN.  Martha called her “boring,” “confused,” “a dangerous person,” and a “real problem.”  When the domestic diva was told about the sales numbers regarding Palin’s new book, Going Rogue, she responded with a insincere “Good for her!” adding “I wouldn’t watch her if you pay me”.

Now that’s an invitation for THROWDOWN.  Looks as though Martha’s determined to start one of those celebrity feuds we all know and love so dearly.  Clearly Rachael Ray wasn’t up to the task.  Will Palin?  You know Martha’s going to keep at this until she hooks someone.

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